We started off saying that we weren’t going to get much for Rylie and Bryce this Christmas, and I guess compared to last year, we really haven’t. They have way too much stuff as it is, and they just don’t need anything else. I received several items through my blog for review that I set aside to give to them for Christmas, but since most of it was for Rylie, I felt like I had to buy more for Bryce to make things “even”. Well then I saw a few other things that I knew Rylie really wanted, so I bought those for her. (Her Christmas list consisted of earrings and makeup, so I can at least say that Santa will be bringing her everything she asked for.)
As it stands right now, Rylie’s present count is higher than Bryce’s. He’s 2, so it isn’t like he is going to be counting their gifts, and I’m not concerned this year. At least not enough to go out and get him more toys we don’t have room in our house for. What about when they are 5 and 6? Will they notice if one has a couple more gifts than the other? If they are anything like my brother and I were when we were little, they will be too busy tearing the paper off their gifts as fast as they possibly can and not paying any attention to how many gifts the other kid has.
My issue this year is size. We don’t have any “big” gifts for Rylie. It just worked out that all of her gifts are small in size. Bryce, on the other hand, is getting a workbench that will most likely be assembled under the tree. So now I am wondering if Rylie is going to take issue with the fact that Bryce got a BIG present and she didn’t. My husband doesn’t think so, and he is probably right, but you never know with kids. I like to avoid the Christmas morning meltdowns if at all possible.
At least I don’t have to worry about the monetary aspect of the Christmas gifts yet. My kids don’t understand the value of a dollar, so I could spend $100 on one and $10 on the other and they would have no idea. I know, though, that it is just a matter of time. Tweens and teens want electronics, and that makes for quite the expensive Christmas, I’m sure. When they do understand the value of money, though, I imagine that we will try to keep things equitable that way.
I realize that there is more to Christmas than gifts, and more important things than trying to keep things “fair” for your children. If you do celebrate Christmas with gifts, though, and have multiple children, I’m sure you want everyone to be happy on Christmas morning and don’t want one child to feel slighted because their sibling got more than they did. So tell me, how do you keep it fair and equal?
12 comments:
In the past, we try and both spend the same while having the same amount. A friend of mine does 3 gifts like Baby Jesus got 3 gifts. And I think that is what we may do this year. They have way too much already. And we will still fill stockings. But we thought it may be a good thing to start now because those 3 gifts will definitely be expensive as they get older:)
my parents started out by saying that since jesus only got 3 presents, we would only get 3 presents. that lasted for a good long time-- probably until my older sister reached the age when she wanted more "stuff"-- also when my parents admitted that they weren't particularly religious, and we stopped going to church. ahem. but after that, they stuck with spending the same dollar amount on us all-- my mom can get it to within 10 cents ever year. she's pretty remarkable. she also goes out of her way to make sure that my fiance has a similar number of presents as the siblings. she's all-inclusive (and goes overboard on christmas)
we try to spend the same amount,and get the same number of presents.my kids are 9,6 and just 1. my older two are more concerned with who got the most presents,but my husband is more about spending equal amounts of money. I think in general the same amount of presents are better,and for the more expensive stuff maybe just have them pick one thing they really want the most.overall as long as they see something they want under the tree,they are happy.
Our kids are 5,4,2 and 9 months (very soon to be 6,5,3 and 1) all within weeks of Christmas. We try and keep it even but for some reason my son seems to have more of the bigger gifts this year. The baby is probably getting 2 gifts (he doesn't really need anything). We did spend almost the same amount on each child. Growing up with 4 kids my parents got us equally the same amount of stuff some years we got lots and lots of stuff other years more clothes than anything else. We are teaching our kiddos that Christmas is not about Santa and getting gifts but about giving gifts and celebrating the birth of Jesus. We also try and buy stuff they will actually use throughout the year not just for a few weeks then not play with. And this year my hubby who is overseas won't be with us so we are trying to make it more special. I still feel that I should get my oldest child something big but just can't seem to find that 'perfect gift'. On a side note at Walmart today I met another Airmen who was picking up stuff his wife bought. Their son is 1 and she spent $400 in gifts for him. I looked at the cart and was amazed and laughed at how much c-r-a-p she bought. When my kids were that age they had more fun playing with boxes and wrapping paper than the few gifts we did buy them.
I think this is a question that every parent of more than one child deals with, and everyone handles it the way that works for their family. I think that also changes from year to year. In my family, we have always told the girls that fair isn't always equal. We live this principle every day, so the gifts aren't counted when it comes to Christmas. With that being said, it is still hard to decide how to handle gifts. This year the girls were desperate for bikes to ride to school, and neither of theirs was going to make it. They got their "big" gift last month after a family meeting discussing the issue. They understood and agreed, but we'll see what happens Christmas morning. They will each only get one or two other gifts this year because we've decided to cut down on "stuff." Hopefully they remember the excitement of the bikes the day they picked them out. We'll see.
We only have one kid but I think that the main thing is that we just buy the same $ amount each Christmas. Last year my daughter got two big gifts and some smaller gifts yet this year she gets many smaller (*ish) gifts.
First off, I subscribe to the "preventive maintenance" theory. Contrary to what some believe, even the most sweetest precious child can feel slighted over a sibling when it comes to Santa. I would recommend a "big" present for your daughter as well. I am not sure of her age and what she likes but perhaps if she is small enough a vanity set where she can primp. It's about the same size as a work bench. I have twins (boy and a girl) and never thought they paid much attention. One year they were around 8 and I have always counted presents right down to X number of toys, X number of clothes. It was an exact match. The problem was I had bought them each a sweat suit. I wrapped Bub's two pieces in one box and wrapped Sis's two pieces in TWO boxes. Needless to say, I had to take him shopping the day after Christmas and get him a new pair of jeans since Sis had more presents to upwrap than he did. We all still laugh about it now, but he was very firm that he was cheated out of a gift. Kids.
First off, I subscribe to the "preventive maintenance" theory. Contrary to what some believe, even the most sweetest precious child can feel slighted over a sibling when it comes to Santa. I would recommend a "big" present for your daughter as well. I am not sure of her age and what she likes but perhaps if she is small enough a vanity set where she can primp. It's about the same size as a work bench. I have twins (boy and a girl) and never thought they paid much attention. One year they were around 8 and I have always counted presents right down to X number of toys, X number of clothes. It was an exact match. The problem was I had bought them each a sweat suit. I wrapped Bub's two pieces in one box and wrapped Sis's two pieces in TWO boxes. Needless to say, I had to take him shopping the day after Christmas and get him a new pair of jeans since Sis had more presents to upwrap than he did. We all still laugh about it now, but he was very firm that he was cheated out of a gift. Kids.
We spend the same amount on each kid, and I *try* to make the gifts equal. This year, I'm not spending as much on the baby. She's only 4 months, and can't open them anyway!
This is why I'm looking forward to the days when we can say "We are going on a cruise! That's your Xmas present!" Boom. Problem solved ;)
Wow....this conversation sounds familiar?? LOL! I think you know that I agree with you. We try as hard as possible to keep it equal. But at this age, they aren't really going to know the difference. They don't understand the value of a dollar, so no worries there. And they are just going to be so excited to be opening presents anyway, that I don't think they will notice if one child has more. But, that will change I am sure :)
My kids are 13 and 11 and I try to spend the same value on each child, I think this is fair and will always continue to do so. I prefer to ask the kids what they want for Christmas and I get a long list. This year my I've resorted to online shopping as an experiment as the kids wanted cell phones, I received some cheap Tracfone phones at my door and the kids have already seen the parcels, they are so excited. Even though the parcels aren't for me receiving parcels from online shopping feels like Christmas day every time you get a delivery
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